5 Realistic Approaches to New Year’s Resolutions

Do you find yourself setting New Year’s resolutions each year, only to forget about them months, weeks, or even days later? If so, you’re not alone. According to statistics published by Forbes, the average resolution lasts only 3.74 months. In fact, so many people abandon their resolutions that January 17 has been declared by many sources as “Ditch New Year’s Resolution Day.” Often times, the worst part about not being able to maintain a resolution is the fact that you wind up feeling guilty, disappointed or even ashamed for not keeping up with it. These feelings can often trigger a pendulation or "screw it" mentality that can result in--not only a return to pre-resolution behaviors--but an increase in more self-destructive behaviors due to negative beliefs about one's ability to maintain commitment to themselves. 

The majority of this can be avoided if you only set more realistic goals for yourself. Rather than attempting lofty resolutions that will demand you overhaul your entire life, decide to slowly incorporate smaller habits and routines. For example, some of the most common New Years Resolution include:

Exercise

If you want to start exercising more, resolve to take walks three or four times a week, commit to attending that one weekly exercise class, or pick two days a week to go to the gym. This could also look like deciding you're going to walk to your favorite coffee or bagel shop on the weekends rather than driving, or taking the stairs rather than taking the elevator or escalator. 

These goals are more realistic than saying you'll hit the gym every single day, because they allow for some flexibility in your schedule rather than developing a rigid expectation. 

Organization

If you want to get more organized, set a goal to tackle one task, room or closet each week; rather than trying to do it all at once. This will help you stay focused on prioritizing what's most important to organize first and will also help prevent burnout and frustration. 

If your resolution isn't necessarily about a complete overhaul, but rather to just stay on top of cleaning and organization, resolve to practice the "2 minute rule" where you tackle any cleaning/de-cluttering task that will take 2 minutes or less to complete. Another great hack is what we'll call the "sticky hands rule" where anytime you pick up an object, you must place it back where it belongs. Yes, this means putting dishes directly into the dishwasher rather than leaving them in the sink! 

Keeping with the idea of setting realistic goals, these tricks to getting your home organized help break the tasks into smaller, measurable and more convenient ways, so you won't feel as bogged down or overwhelmed by your resolution.  

Saving Money

If you want to save money, resolve to setting aside a set amount or percentage of each paycheck into a savings account (or even better--a High Yield Savings Account!). Make sure to make this amount small enough that you won't actually feel much of a difference in your daily life but large enough that over time, it'll actually build your savings. For some, this could be $10 or $20 dollars, for others this could be 10% of your paycheck. Some companies even have an option in their payroll for you to have your paycheck automatically split into different accounts--that way there's even less temptation to hold onto the money, and you won't even notice it's gone. 

If you want to cut back on your spending, set your resolution to eating out only once or twice a week rather than cutting out restaurants entirely. This could also look like having a specific budget for "fun-money" (clothes, home decor, hobbies, etc.) that you allow yourself to spend each month or resolving to buy more second-hand than new, as second-hand is often much more economical (and bonus--better for the environment!). 

Making small changes with your finances will allow you to see progress toward your goals without feeling as though you've sacrificed everything that allows you to live enjoyably. 

Hobbies

If you want to engage more in hobbies that you enjoy, resolve to engaging in that hobby a set amount of time each week or each month, rather than having to accomplish a certain amount. For example, resolve to finish one book each month (rather than one each week), or resolve to read for 1-2 hours each week rather than 30 minutes each day. Another example would be to resolve to engaging in your hobby for one or two hours each week (depending on the hobby), or 2-4 times a month.

Creating time- or frequency-limited goals provides structure to the goal without setting unrealistic expectations of what you will accomplish. 

Sleep

If you want to get more sleep, resolve making a 30-minute change to your nighttime routine. This could mean going to bed a half hour earlier, (which would add a total of 3.5 hours of sleep to your weekly inventory!) rather than saying you'll go to bed at 9pm each night. 

This could also mean turning off screens (tv, computer, phone, etc.) a half hour earlier, and resolving to reading, meditating or journaling for the 30 minutes before bed. Shining bright light in our eyes right before bed is a sure-fire way to prevent our brains from entering relaxation/sleep mode and impacts your ability to transition into a restful sleep. 

One last example we'll mention is resolving to stop snacking a half hour earlier than you typically do. Often times, the foods we choose to eat later in the evening are high in sugars and/or carbohydrates and become fast-acting energy once digested. This negatively impacts our sleep, because our body takes that energy and wants to use it for a quick boost--completely derailing the slow-down/relaxation process required to fall into a restful sleep. Instead, when you'd regularly go for the popcorn or ice cream, go brush your teeth -- this will signal to your brain that snacking is done for the day, and it's time to transition to sleep.

Key things to remember when creating new commitments to yourself:

• Action-oriented resolutions tend to be more successful than avoidance-oriented resolutions. So, if your goal is to eat healthier this year, you may want to resolve to cook one new nutritious meal each week rather than saying that you’re going to stop eating sweets.
• Habit pairing is one of the most effective ways of building new habits. Habit pairing is exactly how it sounds--when you pair a new habit with an old, well-established one. For example, taking your supplements with your breakfast or creating your schedule for exercise or hobbies when you sit down to make your grocery list. 
• Having grace with yourself when you "mess up." You're human. The likelihood that you're going to stick to this resolution 100% is nearly impossible, and so to remember that even if you make small shifts, that counts as something. 

Bonus Resolution: Start Attending Therapy

Everyone can benefit from speaking to a therapist, so if you don’t already attend therapy, now’s the perfect time to start doing so. The therapists at The Carlile Therapy Group can help you clarify changes you might want to make in your life, show you how to set realistic goals, and support you in achieving those objectives. Contact us today to schedule your first therapy session.